A Parent's Guide to Supporting Your LGBTQIA Child: Love, Acceptance, and Exploration
At Remedy Sense Counseling, we witness the profound impact families can have on a child's well-being. There's no greater joy than seeing a parent embrace and celebrate their child's unique identity. If your child has expressed that they identify as LGBTQIA, you may be wondering how to support them in a way that makes them feel safe, validated and hopeful.
The LGBTQIA spectrum encompasses a beautiful diversity of identities and experiences. Your child might be lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, non-binary, questioning, or somewhere else entirely. It's important to understand that this journey is personal. Coming to terms with their identity can happen gradually, and they may not have all the answers themselves.
Creating a Safe Space for Exploration
The most important step you can take is to create a safe and loving environment for your child to explore. This means letting them know you're there for them, unconditionally. Here are some ways to foster that safe space:
Open Communication: Let your child know you're open to talking about anything, including their gender identity and sexual orientation. Start conversations by asking open-ended questions and be an active listener.
Respectful Language: Use their preferred pronouns consistently, even if it's new to you. This shows respect and affirms their identity.
Normalize Exploration: Let them know it's okay to explore and question things. Their identity may evolve over time, and that's perfectly normal.
Avoid Assumptions: Don't assume you know their experience. Ask questions and listen attentively.
Educate Yourself and Your Child
Knowledge is power. Educate yourself about LGBTQIA identities and experiences. Here are some resources:
The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ (Crisis intervention and suicide prevention for LGBTQIA youth)
GLAAD: https://glaad.org/ (Media monitoring for LGBTQ representation)
PFLAG: https://pflag.org/ (Support and advocacy for LGBTQ+ people and their families-we have one in Gastonia and Charlotte!)
Human Rights Campaign: https://www.hrc.org/ (LGBTQ+ civil rights organization)
Locally, we also have nonprofits like Time Out Youth (Charlotte, NC) that support LGBQIA kids and teens and their families!
Explore LGBTQIA-themed children's books with your child, or watch shows and movies featuring positive LGBTQIA representation. When they see characters they can relate to, especially if those characters are living positive, happy lives, it can inspire your child and help them feel like they aren’t alone.
Respect Their Identity and Expression
Let your child express themselves authentically. This could involve using a different name or pronouns, or exploring clothing and styles that feel comfortable to them, regardless of gender norms. Follow their lead, even if it changes regularly. Remember, they are trying to figure this out, too, and when you are exploring, you may take many paths until you find what you’re looking for!
Challenges and How to Navigate Them
There may be challenges along the way. Your child might face societal pressures, discrimination, or even internal struggles. Here's how you can help:
Be Their Advocate: If your child faces discrimination at school or elsewhere, be their advocate. Speak up for them and help them navigate these situations.
Seek Professional Support: Therapy can be a valuable resource for LGBTQIA youth and their families. A therapist can provide a safe space for your child to explore their feelings and navigate challenges.
As a parent, you might have questions and concerns of your own. There are resources available to help you on this journey. Consider joining a support group for parents of LGBTQIA children, like PFLAG or a local Facebook Group. Sharing experiences with others who understand can be incredibly helpful, and you can learn a lot about supporting your child.
Above all, celebrate your child's unique qualities and the person they are becoming. Their LGBTQIA identity is a beautiful part of them. Let them know you're proud of them, no matter what.
Here are some additional thoughts:
Patience is Key: Coming to terms with one's identity can take time. Patience and understanding are essential.
Focus on the Positive: Celebrate milestones and achievements, big or small.
Embrace the Journey: This is a journey for both you and your child. Embrace the learning and growth opportunities it presents.
Remember, your love and acceptance are the greatest gifts you can give your child. By creating a safe and supportive environment, you can empower them to thrive and embrace their authentic selves. If you or your child are looking for help navigating this time in their life, give us a call. We have several therapists who can help both of you!
List of Resources (national and local)
The Jed Foundation (Mental health resources for teens and young adults)
